Have you ever woke up in the middle of the night reaching for your phone to call your son to see if he’s all right? Have you ever got a call late at night scared to answer hoping your son was not locked up or dead? Have you ever heard police sirens going past your home and you text your son to make sure he’s at home? Have you ever gave your son the 3rd degree about how he is “supposed” to act when stopped by police? Have you ever been scared for your son to drive on the highway? Have you ever been afraid for your son to be in the car with his friends so they wouldn’t be viewed as suspicious? Have you ever been in court with your son and told him to take the plea deal even if he didn’t do what they say he did because you were scared they were going convict him and give him the maximum sentence? Have you ever heard gunshots and went into a panic, praying that it was not your child? Have you ever watched the news and they said they were looking for a male in his early twenties, 5ft 11 inches, last seen wearing a black hoodie and you sit there, pray, hoping they don’t mistake your son for the “suspect”? Have you ever raised a son that you prayed for constantly, scared for repeatedly, anxiety and fear sets in once they leave your presence? If you haven’t ever experienced any of these emotions, you have never raised a Black Son. So, please don’t try to comfort us when you first start suspending our black boys, then expelling them out of school, then putting them in juvenile detention centers, then racial profiling them, then disproportionately locking them up and ultimately killing them either emotionally and sometimes physically. As a black mother with a black son I’m tired of crying and I’m tired of seeing them die so White Privileged America you won’t ever feel the “Have You Ever” Syndrome because you will never experience this type of trauma of raising a black son.
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